There are times when the weight is just too heavy.
When circumstances overwhelm us.
When the call from the hospital or the child’s mistake or the wound unwittingly delivered is just too raw to proceed without acknowledgement.
In the past I fought that.
I ignored it.
I numbed it with wine or Facebook or an endless list of incompletable but incredibly business producing tasks.
I fabricated other problems to think about.
I focused on other people’s concerns.
This time is different.
When the weight grew too heavy, I fell.
I told the right people about the weight. Gave them the details and trusted.
And they asked.
“How are you? Do you want to talk?”
And I cried more. And they comforted and coached.
And we were all softer for the moment.
Had lunch with a great friend today. She is really struggling with a great deal of change, all of it out of her control and a great deal of it impacting her partner and their relationship. She confessed that she gets frustrated, she yells, and because I know her so well, I knew the rest of the story about the guilt and self-beating that follows those exchanges. “He doesn’t deserve that.” No he doesn’t. And neither does she.
While I am always reluctant to whip a coaching session out of my pocket, there are times where a little tool, a little strategy can really help somebody. So I asked her if I could offer a strategy and then told her about The Watcher. Continue reading
Some days I just don’t feel like it. Like today, when it’s been raining here in Mid-Maryland for what surely must be 40 days and 40 nights.
I don’t feel like doing what I need to do. I certainly don’t feel like doing what I should do, some of which is there on the table getting drenched, yet again.
I have a deeply entrenched case of the yucks.
Over time I’ve learned some really helpful steps for addressing yucks, even when the weather is relentlessly bad. Continue reading